


Paradoxia

by Armistice



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-31
Updated: 2012-10-31
Packaged: 2017-11-17 11:53:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/551262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Armistice/pseuds/Armistice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's not until a few months after the Winter Cup ends that Shintarou finally confronts him.<br/>i.e. Angsty Akashi ficlet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Paradoxia

**Author's Note:**

> Since Akashi came back home to Tokyo for break, they've tried to resume their meets. Every second Wednesday, he and Midorima have a little intellectual conversation at local cafe where they drink tea and play Shogi.

They find a table in the corner where they can set up, and a waitress comes over with the tea that they ordered.  
“I want you to talk to me.” Shintarou says after she walks away.

Akashi reaches for the tea kettle. “About what?”

“About your heterochromia getting worse.”

Akashi's fingers still on the handle of the pot, but he feels no amount of surprise. Once Shintarou had told him his plans to become a doctor, he knew it was only a matter of time before the issue was brought up.  
“The genetic disorder--” He stops briefly to focus on filling the cup. “is normally mild, but I have an aggravated case.”

“Is your vision deteriorating?” He can hear veiled concern and it is unnerving.

Akashi nods and blows into his cup to cool the tea. Initially, there hadn’t been much change beyond his eye-color. But, recently he's noticed a light blurry outline forming in his field of vision.  
“My eyesight is still sharper than most.” He adds, indifferently.

“That is entirely irrelevant. How long have you known?”  
Shintarou has enough tact to keep his voice low, but there is a certain hardness to his voice and Akashi watches him carefully from the behind the lip of his cup before replying.

  
“The summer before third year at Teiko.”

Almost two years ago. Just before the oath. Shintarou seems to be processing the information and he sits quietly for a moment, tapping his fingers lightly on the table.  
“Have you told anyone?”

  
Akashi swallows a sip of tea. “My new team.”

Shintarou looks momentarily hurt and Akashi feels the need to explain himself.  
“They needed to know.” And, this is the part that pains him the most to say. “If I want to keep my sight in that eye, I'm going to have to stop playing basketball.”

Shintarou stares at him, but Akashi refuses to meet his eyes.  
“When?”

“This will be the last year.”  
And, it leaves a bitter taste in his mouth every time he says it.

Shintarou sits back in his seat and crosses his arms. Thankfully, the dimmed lighting prevents Akashi from see anything beyond the glare on his glasses .  
“And when were you planning on telling us? After you finally quit?” 

 _Us._  

It's so rare for Shintarou to associate himself with the group that it makes Akashi want to smile. But, this isn't the time for that. He holds his cup firmly in his hands instead, feeling the warmth spread through his fingertips.  
“I didn't think it mattered.”

“Of course it matters-” Shintarou starts, but Akashi cuts him off. Talking about his disability has started to make him feel like a broken toy.

“You want me to tell them, _now_?” His fingers clench around the cup, but he manages to school himself before he makes a mess of it. “This is my last year and I will not have it ruined by you all thinking you have a right to take it easy on me.”

Shintarou snorts and leans forward, reaching for the kettle to pour himself a cup.  
“We all respect you too much to ever be that cruel.”

And Akashi knows that. But, it still doesn't mean that his mind will let him forget the possibility. This is a personal issue that Akashi does not want to be pressed about.  
“Regardless of that,” He says sharply. “I want you to keep this to yourself. If I decide to tell anyone earlier, it will be my decision, and my decision alone.”

If Shintarou is not satisfied with that, he does not show it.  
“I understand.”

After a while of them drinking their tea in moody silence, Akashi looks at Shintarou and grabs the board that has been lying forgotten on the table.

“Unluckily for you, Shogi still has no effect on the state of my eyesight.”

It's a rather poor attempt at breaking the tension, but it still manages to get a half smile out of Shintarou.

 

**Author's Note:**

> _The genetic disorder Akashi is referring to is Pigment Dispersion Syndrome. Pigment dispersion syndrome is where small bits of the pigmentation of the iris break off and cause pressure to build up in the back of the eye. It can lead to pigmentary glaucoma and an eventual loss of vision. Usually, it is not an issue until someone is in their late 20's or 40's, but it can be expedited by exercise. One of the symptoms is heterochromia._
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> Inspired by Akashi's eyes, his mention of the oath, and dialogues about the toll being a Miracle takes on the body.


End file.
